Notes to Self: No. 6,221-6,223

  1. There is a finite limit to the amount of bluing that can be applied to a load of whites
  2. No matter how good it seems at the time, consuming three brownies and a Coke in rapid succession before a meeting is really not a good idea
  3. When you go out this weekend, your shoes will be vomited on by the cat. There is no escaping this inevitability, as she will find them and can pick locks
  4. Michigan roads can suck it. Just blew out two tires this morning on my way to the airport

21 Replies to “Notes to Self: No. 6,221-6,223”

  1. note to self- after you buy a new red t-shirt,you wont want everyone to know its brand new (that’ll kill your rock star image) so put it in the wash with the whites, it’ll give it that faded look.

  2. 1. There is a finite limit to the amount of bluing that can be applied to a load of whites – Never! there’s no such thing as too much bloo.

    2. No matter how good it seems at the time, consuming three brownies and a Coke in rapid succession before a meeting is really not a good idea – Kinda like chugging down a yard glass of ale before running a 100 yard dash.

    3. When you visit Natalie this weekend, your shoes will be vomited on by the cat. There is no escaping this inevitability, as she will find them and can pick locks – Fate is so unkind.

    :geek:

  3. If you have taught me anything, don’t worry about the brownies. It’s drinking the diet coke with mentos.

    Sitting on trash, how come there isn’t a picture of my x-wife in here?

  4. Umm. If Natalie has a cat with a dependable, annoying habit, perhaps you should exercise a mite of discretion and self-respect. I would test Natalie’s character. That is, decline any invitation where the cat will be present, until she (Natalie is naturally female, right?) recognizes a need to change. If she never gets to that point, you have put enough distance between you to make moving on easier.

    Don’t give excuses, at any hint of an invitation ask, ‘Will the vomiting kitty be there? Sorry, no.’ This may seem harsh, but her tolerance of anti-social behavior says several things about her that are *not* good. And if she isn’t able to work toward compromise or correcting the situation, then realistically your only option is to get away from her.

    Unless you intend to take up bingeing, then purging on shoes. Uhh, you haven’t already done that have you? Natalie didn’t get the cat after her shoes were splattered repeatedly with projectile vomit, did she, like the drunken puppet Gary in the alley in ‘Team America: World Police’? For shame.

  5. There is a finite limit to the amount of bluing that can be applied to a load of whites

    So now you’re not all white? You’re all blue? :wtf:

  6. How about combining 2 and 3?
    Eat the brownies/coke before visiting Natalie, then puke in the cat’s basket just to let it know that it’s fucking with the WRONG alimentary canal.

  7. If you think wolfing down brownies and a Coke is bad, try adding in a bag of Doritos, a boiled egg and an apple. Ooohh, I did not feel good that day. :puke:

  8. What’s “Bluing” your whites?

    I’ve heard of Bleaching….but not Bluing. Is it like a Laundry Reach-around?

  9. [Comment ID #78317 will be quoted here]

    Considering what you let that dog do to your cat in the park, can you blame it? 😆

  10. Blueing laundry came before bleach. The alternative to adding blueing was to hang the clothes in the sun (and acid rain, dust, etc.) to keep white clothes, towels, sheets, etc. from turning yellow. People don’t use blueing as much anymore, except for science fair projects — add blueing to coal, and watch crystals grow in pretty colors.

    You do have coal in your furnace, right?

  11. If you are feeling blue, get blown by a brownie, do three lines of coke, vomit on Natalie’s cat, then drive to michigan on the rims.

Comments are closed.