More people we can safely dislike #11

  1. People from the South who claim that 78°F is “chilly”. Hold up, son. You don’t know what chilly is.
  2. Flight attendants who are more concerned with their nails than their passengers.
  3. The guy you see in your rear view mirror, flipping you off because you dared to stop at the red light instead of blowing it.*
  4. People who forward me links to my own site, with the note, “Dude, this site is hilarious. You should check it out.”
  5. Companies who actually send me mail addressed to “Mr. or Mrs. Dave Zilla”.
  6. Neighbors who run their chainsaw at midnight.

*The best part of this was, he went careening past me, swore at me again, and then I saw him in the lobby of the agency I work at, waiting for an interview. With me. He went pale when he saw me.

28 Comments

  1. SimpleMom

    People from the North who say 2 days at 90 degrees is a “heatwave” …

  2. Re: #3

    Funny, I always thought that only happened in the movies. That’s classic.

  3. Irish

    Hasselhoff? :puke:

    1) People that tell you that you are hired, only to flake out at the last minute and not give you the job.
    2) HIllbillies
    3) People that owe you money and never pay. (without a little persuasion) 😈
    4) People who act like they know it all…..(annoying to those of us who do. ) 🙂
    5) Did I mention hillbillies?

  4. + Neighbors who mow at 6am on a Saturday.

    + People who work at AMC – for making us all move from theater 12 to theater 3 because they misprinted the tickets, and starting the movie late to boot.

    + The remaining majority of morons in this country who STILL do not understand how cars are supposed to proceed through a 4-way stop.

  5. People who insist on pushing their religious beliefs on me. You don’t believe in medicine? Well, guess what, I DO so I’m going to take this Tylenol and enjoy a painfree afternoon!

  6. Spud

    “*The best part of this was, he went careening past me, swore at me again, and then I saw hi”m in the lobby of the agency I work at, waiting for an interview. He went pale when he saw me.”

    Bwahahahahahaaa, great image Mr & or Mrs Zilla.

    😈

  7. Randy

    People who believe that the rules apply to everyone but them: They park in the handicapped parking spots even though they are not physically handicapped and they park in the yelllow painted area which is a fire lane, while they litter.

  8. “+ Neighbors who mow at 6am on a Saturday.” Heck I wish my neighbor wood just mow. He insist on dry cranking his boat every saturday morning at 8 am and I pray for the day that it blows up and will never have to hear the revving of this red headed step son of the SS minow boat again. ❓

  9. Flash Gordon

    By dang, they is nothin’ wrong with hillbillies. I are one from northwest
    Georgia and we believe they is much to be said for inbreeding; it improves
    the race.
    Mexicans also believe this. 😕 👿 👿 :thong: :wtf:

  10. Jinx

    People who leave dirty diapers in parking lots or on park benches. Ick.

  11. Nunu

    People wh send photos to Beedogs.com:roll:
    People who drive 10 miles an hour in the passing lane
    Fat people who wear slutty clothes :wtf: 😳

  12. zinta

    Hey.. I’m from the SOUTH.. Texas that is… and I LOVE THE HEAT.. can’t stand cold.

    If I had my way.. I’d live on some Island in the South Pacific where it never gets below 70… unfortunately.. there are those pesky storms and sunamis.

    I hate people that send me spam… I wish I had a God smite button… That would give them all herpes.

  13. People in california who say 70 is “cold” and have to get a sweater.

    Anyone who tells me one more time how great sushi is and looks on me as if i’m a godless heathen when I say we went above and beyond to try to like it it’s just not our thing.

    Do did you tell the guy he was interviewing with about what an :wang: this guy was? I so would have.

  14. Oh yeah, to hop on someone elses… people who tell me to take “herbal” or holistic meds to aid my ulcer because herbals are soooo much more effective. Ya know, guess what meds work fine, and I don’t have a ulcer in my staomach, I have on in my esophagus because I never osught treatment and let the acid eat my esopheagl lining away and mutate into a percancerous conditon. And btw, herbals more often than not make things worse. So thanks for wanting me to die, bite my ass.

  15. people unprepared for the Soup Naziesque ordering methods at Starbucks

    the unnaturally cheery people who work for above company

    the nicotine stained finger weirdoes who ask if they can root through your ashtray (sometimes they go barefoot!!)

    the people who don’t understand that the cold shoulder means that you don’t really want to talk to them

    anne coulter -inside random bash here.

    parents who insist on turning the smidgen of hair on a baby’s head into a ‘cute little pigtail’ that sticks straight up off the top of the noggin

    morbidly obese people who wander around in short shorts stolen from their young teen daughter

    the crazy-ass drug dealers who live in my neighborhood (i live in a small suburb of vancouver, bc) who think it’s totally acceptable to smack their bitches and hoes insensate at 2am

    those same crazy-ass drug dealers who, while trying to mix their meth at 4 am in the morning accidentally set fire to themselves, thereby needing assistance from fourteen thousand firetrucks and an ambulance

    the lonely fruitloop who stands on the patio howling in synchronicity with the firetruck alarms on account of it makes a neato sound

    hippies. get a job already. seriously. put down the bongwater and stop asking me for money. cut the hair, use some motherfrickin’ VIdal Sassoon on that shit and join the human race. no, no, please … really, i insist.

    damn, i could go on forever

    :wtf:

  16. Zeke

    people who wake up at 2 in the morning, thinking “hey! i’ll go ride my motorcycle through quiet residential neighborhoods!”

  17. [Comment ID #72072 will be quoted here]

    Personally, I have nothing against herbal remedies, just people who say “the power of positive thinking” will heal me. You think I’m bad now whining how congested I am, just think how I’d be if I didn’t have medicine!

    👿 :puke: :dead:

  18. People who start using program/OS “Y” only to complain that it isn’t exactly like “Z”. “So why the bleedin hell are you switching?”

    Worse than the red-light honker are the ones behind you who honk immediately upon the light turning green, even though you’re eight cars back from the intersection and even the first car hasn’t moved yet.

    People who dive on the automated checkout ahead of you aaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnddddddd ttttheeeeeenn uuuuuuusse iiiiiitttttttt rreeeeeeeaaaaalllllllyyyyyyyy slooooooooooow. They even have these at the library now for checking out books, same effect. Barcode, red light, present, ‘beep!’, next item! TODAY, people!

    Guys who eat, breathe, and sleep sports, and try to start a sports conversation with you, only to conclude that you must be a fag, communist, and terrorist because you aren’t as obsessed about sports as they are.

    People who stare at us like we’re from outer space when we take our handicapped son out with us. Pardon us, he’s autistic so he acts funny sometimes; nevertheless we had this foolish notion that we could eat in this restaurant in peace. Could you find a picture to go look at?

    The producers of reality TV shows. Period.

    Door-to-door salesmen who actually have to *climb* through the “no solicitors” signs to get to my front door and bug me, then have the nerve to deny up and down that they’re there to sell me something. Evidentally, there’s a book out there called “Being a jackass will win you sales!”

    Append to the end of this list everything George Carlin doesn’t like.

  19. Cindy

    Overall……stupid people……it should hurt really, really bad. Or we should be able to slap them silly with no repercussions. 😈

  20. Myra

    People who think they have the right to tell you where to work, how to think, who to date, what to wear just because they have have the luck to live to be older than you are. I’m from the South and I’ll take nice cool mountain weather any time, I hate the heat, and don’t get me started on the humidity and mosquitoes! People who can’t spell (like some of your readers Dave…), and others who mangle the English language. We fuss about how immigrants should learn to speak English and we don’t do so well ourselves.

  21. me

    U guyz 4 complainin so much………………………and tax collectors……and my mom….. 😡

  22. mikeme

    bitch,bitch,bitch,bitch,bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😕 😕 😕

  23. Mark

    Huh? 78? F?

    We’re talking temperature right? Can someone explain? Translate?

  24. Marcus

    People who smell bad. Next time stand closer to the soap.
    People who talk with their hand eventhough they are on the telephone.
    People who think they know everything.
    People who forget their manners.
    People who are too stupid to exist.
    David Hasslehoff singing :puke:

  25. heather cleveland

    people who think i want to watch their kids because i don’t have any of my own……i already know your child is satan spawn……you don’t want to watch him….why the hell should i?
    people who tell me dieting tips….fuck off people you have no idea…don’t lay your judgement on me
    my husband for being a prick 24frickin7 (if you hate your job so much get a new one….quit your bitching already!)
    people who use proper capitalization……i have short fingers, using the shift key is like finding the lost pyramids of egypt…..never gonna happen
    my dog for eating crayons then shitting rainbow turds on the freshly mowed lawn
    bras for being so expensive. if you HAVE to wear a bra shouldn’t they be cheaper because they are required?
    people who call to talk about nothing because they think i would like to hear it
    people who say my name over and over as if i am deaf. i heard you i’m just not listening
    people that come to YOUR house to visit YOU and try to make you feel like shit because your house is a little messy….it was clean yesterday, sorry you missed it.
    my best friend’s step dad for being an anger-filled, drunk, asshole sports nut who looks down his nose at me because he knows all and sees all. he says stupid shit to me so i have to give him a strong go straight to hell and have another fucking beer you bastard look.
    my neighbor for being a peeping tom…if you want to see some hooties you should really try the internet….i hear you can look at tits for free
    my other neighbor for mowing his grass and blowing all of his cut grass on my driveway only to complain that my dog took a shit in his yard….blow it out of your ass gramps
    young punks who think because i drive a neon with white tail lights that i want to race….IT’S A 4 BANGER!!!!!!! IT DOES ZERO TO THIRTY-FIVE IN 60 SECONDS
    my stepdad for looking like barney from the andy griffith show. get the chip off your shoulder
    people who think i should spend a little more time in the sun……..i have red hair and freckles….can you say FAIR SKINNED!
    the trash collector people in my neighborhood for stealing a 12 pack from our garage….if you wanted a beer you could have just asked.
    my birthday for making me turn 25. why god why?!
    people who drink coffee. don’t you know that coffee causes people to stink up a bathroom real bad….not only that, coffee is gross :java:
    asthma for not letting me breath when appropriate..albuterol is my god
    my brothers for marrying the biggest bitches in the world…good going guys
    me for marrying the biggest prick in the world….so i guess my brothers and i are even
    people who think because you are from the south you gotta be stupid. being stupid is an option.
    people who work at wal-mart.
    people who drive insanely fast as if their house were on fire or they were having a heart attack only to drive to a gas station and get a blunt…….it was a weed emergency i reckon
    people that ride your ass, pass and get right in front of you only to slam on brakes to turn……hey asshole all that insane driving is uncalled for. have you ever heard the expression “hurry up and wait”? in such a hurry to wait makes no sense to me

    i am really a happy person….i just hate people……all of them 👿

  26. GrumpySimon

    Dude! I found the funniest website! it’s like dubya dubya dubya dave silla dot com or something. It’s HILARIOUS!

  27. brianne

    *my boyfriend… for being a sex-crazed moron! God fuck it if a girl has better things to do then lie in bed getting fucking 24 fucking 7!!!!! makes me so made! all he ever thinks about is :boob: :thong: :wang: and me!!
    * and my friend for always trying to watch me and my boyfriend. He’s mine dammit so stop watching us!!
    * and my other friend for always begging if me to set him up with my best friend. she doesnt like you! she despisses you!!

    i hate the whole human race except myself! …..and dave!!

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