If fruits had a class structure

1. beyonduplication

   29 June, 2007, 12:59 pm

   passion fruit: always reminded me of some guy in a polyester suit and big, gold chain. passion fruit is over-hyped and thinks it’s so great… 🙄

2. Ronica

   29 June, 2007, 1:20 pm

   Grapes: The fruit of the gods. Reminds me of the Romans with plam fronds relaxed before beheadding whom ever has crossed them 😮

3. Astryd

   29 June, 2007, 1:23 pm

   Peaches/Nectarines-‘ZillaGirlz of the Fruit Family. Get them fuzzy or smooth. Rich, tasty, powerful and desired by many.

   Tomatoes-The Black Sheep of the Fruit Family. “We know it’s there but is it really one of us?”

   Banana-Low class but important. Responsible for educating many women in the arts of oral entertainment to improve life quality, health and create peace on earth. Those few fortunate and successfull may qualify someday as lower middle class.

4. Davezilla

   29 June, 2007, 1:33 pm

   [Comment ID #193776 will be quoted here]

   That’s a dead-on review.

5. Nikki

   29 June, 2007, 1:49 pm

   Cherries are easy, like the neighborhood sluts.

6. Mikeme

   29 June, 2007, 1:55 pm

   Nobody admits to have/like Dingleberries! 😕

7. Bigwavdave

   29 June, 2007, 2:37 pm

   You want a sexy fruit? One word: FIG. Split a ripe fig down the middle and tell me what you see. Open that puppy up and EAT IT! No utensils required, just a strong tongue. A zillafruit if ther ever was one.

8. Bjorn Freeh

   29 June, 2007, 3:32 pm

   Wow, this is like comparing apples and oranges…

   Apricots, nature’s candy. A smartypants fruit that’s sweet, tangy, provocative, upscale. A thinking-person’s fruit. The Steve Martin of fruit.

9. yankee04

   29 June, 2007, 3:56 pm

   Raspberries-the fruit that makes people laugh out loud when put on their tummy.

10. Meagan

    29 June, 2007, 4:13 pm

    Blueberries: The geeky fruit that’s not cool enough to be a grape. That’s why they like to hide out in muffins.

    Lemons: That mean-looking old person sitting across from you on the bus and gives you the evil eye for the whole ride.

    Limes: The gayest of the fruits, but is just so much fun to party with. Makes excellent mojhitos.

    Raspberries: The teenage girl of fruits that loves hanging out with her friends at the mall and talking about the hot boy peppers that walk by.

    Blackberries: The goth teenage girl that hates everything and everyone. She hides her kill list under her bed.

    Cucumber: The other gay fruit but is in denial about it. Has dreams at night about becoming a pickle and being jammed in a jar with other pickles.

    Melons: The busty, voluptuous woman that winks at you from across the room.

    Cantaloupe: The sweet old lady who used to be a melon and likes to reminisce about the old days.

11. beyonduplication

    29 June, 2007, 4:16 pm

    grapes are chameleons. or role-players…. swingers! they’re in everything, always trying to act like something else.

    just you go and read the label on “cranberry juice”

12. rust

    29 June, 2007, 4:16 pm

    Here in the somewhat semi-tropical almost paradise of the no-longer-Dictator-ruled country of Chile, one of the most popular fruits is the CHIRIMOYA. This is the frikkin’ most UGLY thing in the world. It tastes like an un-licked ashtray, and they (the chileans) put it in EVERYTHING. God help you if you travel to Valparaíso and ask for a Chirimoya Alegre

13. Meagan

    29 June, 2007, 4:22 pm

    Blueberry: The geeky fruit that isn’t cool enough to be a grape. That’s why they like hiding out in muffins.

    Lemon: The mean-looking old person sitting across from you on the bus and gives you the evil eye the entire ride.

    Lime: The gayest of the fruits, but is just so much fun to party with! Makes excellent mojhitos.

    Raspberry: The teenage girl of fruits that likes to hang out with her friends at the mall and talk about the hot boy peppers that walk by.

    Blackberry: The goth teenage girl that hates everything and everyone. She hides her kill list under her bed.

    Melon: The busty, voluptuous woman that winks at you from across the room.

    Cantaloupe: The sweet old woman who used to be a melon and likes to reminisce about the old days.

14. Astryd

    29 June, 2007, 4:32 pm

    Strawberry-Crack whore. 😛 (Aren’t you guys proud of me? I was paying attention when y’all taught me that one! 😆 )

15. AnnieB

    29 June, 2007, 7:19 pm

    Honeydew – universally dreaded by husbands. 😛

16. Meagan

    29 June, 2007, 8:17 pm

    Phew! My comments are finally up. I was starting to think I didn’t exist.

17. Drusky

    29 June, 2007, 8:47 pm

    Grapes, the insecure, unhappy fruit. They always seem to be happiest when hanging around in bunches and when they are hard-pressed, all you get is ‘whining’… 🙄

    [Comment ID #193797 will be quoted here]
    Not exactly what you’d drink juice from… 😈

18. Mandy

    29 June, 2007, 9:12 pm

    [Comment ID #193785 will be quoted here]

    LOL! Yup, the whores of the fruit world

19. Spud

    29 June, 2007, 10:23 pm

    Kiwifruit – just like the All Blacks, they think they are da bomb.

    Mango – Just too cool for school, you and your bloody mangoes, go have a party someplace else.

    Quince – This fruit makes me think of some old fart in a rumpled suit with glasses pouring of huge ledgers in a dusty office wiping snot away with a hanky.

    Plums – Upstart DINK(double income no kids) type of fruit, everyone knows one but is loathe to admit it.

20. pablo

    29 June, 2007, 10:47 pm

    Sorry, If I had to put fruits in an order

    Just experimenting
    Out of the closet
    Village person
    Flaming Queen
    Sultan of Cleveland

21. Driver

    29 June, 2007, 11:37 pm

    Raisins- the geriatric fruit, Once young grapes popular in all the social circles. Now after to much fun in the sun reduced to hangimg out in cereal box’s

22. speedy

    30 June, 2007, 9:05 am

    Kiwis, so fuzzy, like big balls, kind of sexy

23. Penguin Pete

    30 June, 2007, 4:52 pm

    I am immersed in the American consumerist culture. What is this fruit you speak of? Everybody knows that fruit flavor comes from some artificial potasium sorbate and citric acid and other unpronouncible ingredients.

24. Penguin Pete

    30 June, 2007, 4:55 pm

    BTW: durians. the terrorists of the fruit world.

25. officeratt

    01 July, 2007, 6:30 pm

    Pablo….are you trying to tell us something??? A fruity are ya ?

26. pablo

    02 July, 2007, 1:18 pm

    [Comment ID #193826 will be quoted here]

    [Comment ID #193992 will be quoted here]

    Officerat has now replaced the Sultan of Cleavland for actively seeking out fruits

27. officeratt

    02 July, 2007, 7:43 pm

    Oh Pablo did I touch a nerve? 😛 😈

28. alex

    23 July, 2007, 7:43 am

    Mango, a nice juicy Mango, slabs of Pakistani Mango… now that’s what the Gods eat.

29. AnnieB

    23 July, 2007, 4:37 pm

    I can’t believe I didn’t notice this before but my God, it’s a first! Almost unbelievable! I caught YOU in a spelling error! Avocado, not Avacado.

    I now proclaim myself to be Chief of the Spelling Police!

    Please hold your applause (and fruit throwing) to a minimum.

    😆

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