Happy birthday, soda lover

I was nine and going to my grandmother’s for my birthday. I loved going to my grandmother’s house. It was creaky, dark and she had children’s books dating back to the 1920s. The only odd thing about her was her recipes were … unexpected, to say the least.

This particular birthday, I was dropped off to spend the weekend at my grandmother’s with my cousin, whose birthday was a few days before mine. She made a cake for both of us.

“Do you like chocolate cake, boys?” Silly question. Of course we did. She returned with a cake with strange green frosting. Something appeared to be moving on top of the frosting. My cousin and I looked at each other nervously.

“Grandma?”
“Yes, dear?”
“What is that brown stuff on the top of the cake?”
“Coca-Cola. I know how you kids love soda, so I poured some all over the cake.”
“Oh.”

“Grandma?”
“Yes, David?”
“May I be excused?”

20 Comments

  1. Sir Osiss

    😳 *WHEW* For a moment there I flashed back to my comment about the carpet cleaners…

  2. Sir Osiss

    What? Was she out of BAKING soda???

  3. First watermelon cake, and now this… what is with the cake experiments?

    Cakes are the new guinea pigs? 🙄

  4. Ok, I’ll say it – those Bacon Balls sound delicious!:wtf:

  5. Anna

    I’ve got to tell the truth, no matter what! Hello, my name is Anna and I’m a coca-cola and chocolate addict. I’ve been clean now for 25 years. ~sigh~ the good old days ….:sad:

  6. Spud

    them thar bacon balls sound aboot right eh!

    😀

  7. Cbatdux

    Carrrrrr-BO-NATE good times, COME ON! (sing with me)

  8. Paige Dalton

    Bacon balls and coke cake.THe breakfast of champions:java:

  9. MIKE

    Why the green icing?

  10. Mikel

    what ever happened to the good coke?

  11. amanda

    “Hi, my name’s amanda. I’m a Coca-cola-cake-a-holic…”

  12. Can you make Mock Mock apple pie using Saltines?

  13. The Gryphon

    Can you make Mock Turtle Soup Pie?

  14. I’ve got my meals planned out for tomorrow: in the morning, Baked Bakin’ Bolls (made with real cotton) followed by a lunch of Coca-Cola® Soup with Oh Henry Bars served in Vanilla Cake-rolls. For dinner, I’ve invited the Mock Turtle over to try some Chilean Asado Aleman and Arab Rice. We figure we can eat ourselves stoopid watching STAR TREK re-runs on SPACE: The Imagination Station while we dig into some of that Whatyousmellin’ Cake. I hope he brings along the homegrown so we can smoke our brains out. They’ll find our bodies the next morning. Caption in the newspapers: PIGS IN BLANKETS STONED COLD.

  15. “Coca-Cola Cake” was almost always my standard birthday cake growing up. But it wasn’t made quite…that way.

  16. Sir Osiss

    Damn! I HATE getting a stupid tune in my head. If I WANTED to hear the same shit over and over for two days I would still be married to the she-bitch from hell. It’s Dave’s fault. He HAD to caption that damned photo 2 days ago “Poopybara”…

    Well, I made up new words to that damnable song and posted it under that picture. Please God, let it be gone now from my head!!!

    WARNING: IF YOU GO BACK AND READ IT, DO NOT BLAME ME IF YOU THEN BECOME ACCURSED!

  17. i swear i think you posted this exact story a couple of years ago. no? 😀

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