Gangs of Mew York

I was walking my cat today (yes, she heels like a dog), and noticed that outside, she gets the same lost look that foreigners get in an airport. Granted, she’s been an indoor cat for 16 years so this is a new thing to her. I started wondering if other cats notice her dazed expression, too. Do outdoor cats look at indoor cats and see an easy mark the way con artists do?

“Hey, look at the fresh meat. Heeeeeey, chica.”
“You lost, pretty girl? C’mere baby. I help you find home.”
“Bitch, I will f*ck your shit up. Where you goin’?”
“Hey, lady. Can you spare a can of tuna? I got five kittens back there that are hungry. Where you goin?”

What do you think? Do outdoor pets plot against the indoor ones?

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14 Replies to “Gangs of Mew York”

  1. i smell i new movie plot.
    a new disney movie plot.
    but i think the sides would be pretty even.

    hah second time first posting.

  2. I can’t help but think of indoor cats as humungus pampered furballs with prissy manners, while outdoor cats are the kind that have bits missing off them and would rather scratch your eyes out than anything else.

    :geek:

  3. – “Hey… you look like an honest person, come down this alley with me.” (Cat Con Artist)
    – “Hey, I could use a new kitten like you on my route…” (Kitty Pimp)
    – “I got some stuff you just gotta try…” (Catnip Dealer)
    – “Wanna change your look for real cheap?” (Ear, Tail, Tongue Piercer/Tattoo Artist)

  4. [Comment ID #73255 will be quoted here]

    I’m certain hundreds of cats lay around hittin’ the ‘nip. Nip dealers in the hood come by with offers of “first one’s free”.

  5. my out-door abyssinian is a real shit-face to the indoor abby. we don’t let her out anymore because he will chase her 20′ up the closest tree.

    all i can see in the shrimp is che guevara. so much for feeling calm.

    i’m not sure i want to work for sebben & sebben but i want to drive a golf ball of a yacht in a kilt and pull a dog sled in the nude. it’s all fun til someone loses an eye.

  6. I have two indoor cats, one fat and lazy, one small and hyperactive. The big one is very territorial and would probably bitch slap anyone who got in her way. The little one would just aggravate them to death like a hyper poodle. I had an outdoor cat, a huge black male who kicked ass and romanced the lady cats all over the neigborhood but he was catnapped by my neighbors when they moved.

  7. Cats are a lot like (most) women, they are only friendly to you ’til they get what they want, then ‘poof’ they’re outa there!

  8. You’re missing the point…
    What you should be wondering is what your cat is saying to other cats while he/she/it takes you for a walk…
    “Yeah, He’s nice enough but I still claw the furniture to keep him in line…”
    “See, I told you guys I wasn’t kidding about him and the all-white thing…”
    “Hey, where can I score some kitty weed? Oh, this human? It’s o.k. He’s with me…”
    😆

  9. Re: the link…
    Maybe he’s just suffering from too much Cocktail Sauce…
    But I’ll bet that shrimp saw Jesus when it saw the net coming straight for it… 😈

  10. The outdoor cats are like a gang in which the indoor cats are not privy to the inside secrets, Because the outdoor cats have to fight for everything, the indoor cats get pimped because they don’t know any better. Cats ALWAYS have a hidden agenda. I have one, so I know.

  11. benendetto-
    I smell a new movie plot
    a new disney movie plot…

    It’s called the aristocats, it’s old.

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