Car loses 3 hit points

Car loses 3 hit points

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25 Replies to “Car loses 3 hit points”

  1. #1:And lo! it seems that our metal steed has been stricken with a magic missile!
    #2:Dude, we totally nailed that effing harpy!
    #3:I dunno, Melchior, i still think we shouldn’t’ve pissed that bridge troll off. he seems to have eaten our engine.
    #4: it is a good thing i have this purple sash, else i would never be able to conjure forth Roadside Assistance.
    #5:Look, look at what evil has done to our most awesome dwarven steam-steed!

  2. Elward and Ivanheld basked in the dappled sunlight as they joyously ventured down yon highway toward the Castle Doofus. Theirs was a carefree jaunt, filled with the expectation of a lively feast at the local Applebee’s with roasted pig and meat pies, as well as saucy ladies aplenty. Little did they know, catastrophe was just around the next cloverleaf.

    As they wrought another tall tale to pass the time, suddenly the powerful beast on which they traveled sputtered, quaked and gasped it’s last breath. As they dismounted, the duo realized they would never reach Castle Doofus in time for the Joust of Lords, their money cleverly laid on Sir Prancelot.

    Perhaps Ivanheld had forgotten to check ye old dipstick for oil, or more likely, Elward had overlooked the level of crude feed the beast required to go further than a ward’s stretch.

    Either way, they were fucked.

  3. “Perhaps if I poke it with my sword our metal carriage will move again, Sir Puffypants?”
    “No need, Sir Dorkus. I shall use my magical powers to command the carriage move forward. Now, noble Ford, I command you move forth!”

  4. Thanks you two, at least I now have idea of what the hell is going on.

    Wearing sashes and long boots is kinda strange in this day and age, plus I couldn’t work out what greenboy was holding nor what pwince buttface was hoping or trying to achieve.

    Well done, it all makes perfect sense now.

    :geek:

  5. Though it had fared through many rush hours, the mighty beast had finally seen its last. Thus, the two forlorn travelers bid farewell to the noble beast as they stick their thumbs in the air…. :mrgreen:

  6. – Reptile and Noob Saibot try out their new fatalities on a Dodge Neon.
    – “Pimp My Ninja Ride”
    – The warriors are confused after traveling through the rift in time and space. They try to teach a car their native tongue.

  7. un-charmed fingers uphelp for an hour
    elward and ivanheld glower
    if we’d visited merlin
    down the road we’d be hurlin’
    instead we’re gay dorks with no power

    happy bad poetry day! 🙄

  8. Dang, it’s Pennsic, and I think I might know the fellow in black…
    Hey, Half my family is there right now and I’d be there too if I could afford it!
    Laugh if you will, but it’s the biggest/best party in the ‘Knowne Worlde’.

  9. If they happen to successfully ‘summon’ AAA, what do they have to roll on the percentage die to get that piece of crap movin’ again?!?

  10. Hey! it’s the two dorks that I sold my lemon — errr, my previously owned vehicle — uhh, it’s divine justice at work.

  11. “So, that’s the problem. The engine got polymorphed into a cave troll. Dammit, Moonwolf, I told you *never* read a scroll until you’ve identified it!”

  12. Is that a circus in the background? These two probably escaped from the
    Tent of the Geeks. :geek: :geek: 😕 :wtf: 😈

  13. “Ah, but I’m from the house of Slytherin. I’m cousin to Draco Malfoy. I will just whip out my wand here and say those words and behold thy car will be fix…Repairo…ahem, repairo…DAMN YOU HARRY POTTER!”

  14. The angry Red Taurus opens it’s hungry mouth as Sir Nafta attempts to cast a freeze monster spell. His trusted companion, Sir Baldy of Dorkamere, realizes the monster was created by a mighty race known as The Teamsters from the far away empire of Dearborn. Knowing that The Teamsters are a powerfull clan and his friend’s magic wasn’t strong enough , He then procedes to create a Gelatinous Cube in his pants… 😈

  15. [Comment ID #73622 will be quoted here]
    Perhaps they only need to cast ‘Animate Dead’ on it…

    😆

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